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Get to know Parenting, Parenting Goals


Ilustration image Get to know Parenting, Parenting Goals
Ilustration image Get to know Parenting, Parenting Goals

Get to know Parenting, Parenting Goals


The dynamics of daily life for children and parents cannot be separated from caring for children in every interaction, whether in games, communication, discussions, listening to opinions, reminding and the like. Parents become role models for children at an early stage of every age development. It is important to pay attention to the upbringing of children so that they will grow and develop according to expectations.


Understanding Children

Based on the Juvenile Justice Act. Children in Law No. 3 of 1997 are stated in article 1 paragraph (2) which reads: "Children are people in cases of naughty children who have reached the age of 8 (eight) years but have not reached the age of 18 (eighteen) years and have never marry.


A child is someone who is not yet 18 (eighteen) years old, including a child who is still in the womb (Law - Law of the Republic of Indonesia No. 35 of 2014 concerning Amendments to Law No. 23 of 2002 on Child Protection).


Definition of Child Protection

Child protection is all activities to guarantee and protect children and their rights so that they can live, grow, develop, and participate optimally in accordance with human dignity and respect. protection from violence and discrimination.



Parenting promotes and supports the physical, emotional, social and intellectual development of children from infancy to adulthood. Parenting refers to the intricacies of raising children and not necessarily from a biological relationship.


All actions that are part of the ongoing interaction process and affect not only children but also parents, which are carried out by adults to children from the time the child is born to adulthood in order to protect, care for, teach, Disciplining and giving guidance is then familiarly called parenting.


Parenting Goals

The goal is to facilitate children to be able to be responsible (independent) and contribute as part of society, inseparable from human relationships with fellow humans and with creators, so that by involving three key parenting objectives, namely:

a. Efforts to meet the needs of children for physical, spiritual, social and emotional well-being. Protecting children, through avoiding potential accidents/hazards or abuse.

b. Provide rules and ensure that the rules are controlled and enforceable.

c. Supporting children, able to develop their potential. If this is done correctly, then the children in the care will be able to become the best generation and also be a cooler for the eyes and hearts of parents.


Types of Parenting

1. Permissive Style

Permissive parents tend not to punish their children. They are more accepting, open, and "attentive" to their child's behavior, impulses, and desires.

Oftentimes, this parenting style is adopted by parents who “cannot” see their child cry or are disappointed. Permissive parenting style is considered not to have a healthy impact on child development.

Permissive parents position themselves as resources that children can use for anything, anytime, and anywhere. As a result, children feel allowed to determine their own activities and behaviors they want to do, stay away from things that they feel control them, and make them not accustomed to obeying authorities/rules. Through this parenting style, children learn to use reason and manipulation to get what they want, without considering the consequences of their behavior.

2. Authoritarian Style

Authoritarian is often described as a parenting style that is full of control. Authoritarian parenting style often uses punishment as a consequence. Not infrequently they also use violence (verbal or non-verbal) to force children to do/think what their parents think is right. Authoritarian parents believe that children need to take orders/words because that is what is right.

Often parents use an authoritarian style because they want their children to live a good life, and avoid things that are not good.

There are several negative effects of this parenting style. The first is that children grow up too dependent on their parents' decisions. They will find it difficult to determine what they want, and tend not to initiate ideas/opinions.

The second is high stress levels. As children develop their autonomy as individuals, it is not uncommon for that autonomy to grow in conflict with parental authority. This prolonged conflict has the potential to disrupt children's mental health.

3. Authoritative Style

Authoritative parents are more focused on directing children's behavior in a rational and issue-oriented manner. They provide space for children to have opinions and provide input.

Thus, children learn to make decisions on the right reasons. Knowing the right reasons and considerations is what authoritative parents emphasize.

Another thing that stands out from this parenting style is how parents control by not restraining children. Parents are able to see the situation from the eyes of adults, but respect the opinions of children through their eyes. They set standards, but recognize that these standards have different tolerance ranges.


Practice Parenting Styles During Daily

Many studies reveal that authoritative is the best parenting style. But in practice, no parenting style can be applied 100% in everyday life. Authoritative has been shown to help children cultivate good behavior and reduce the potential for problematic behavior.

Parenting is more complex than just putting theory into practice in black and white. Parenting requires a strategy that takes into account the agreements and values​​of parents, as well as the personality of each family member.



Get to know Parenting, Parenting Goals

1. Baumrind, D. (1966). Effects of authoritative parental control on child behavior. Child development, 887-907.



4. Law of the Republic of Indonesia No. 35 of 2014 concerning Amendments to Law No. 23 of 2002 concerning Child Protection

Moch. Ferry Dwi Cahyono
Moch. Ferry Dwi Cahyono I'm publisher

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